Feeling more like Kazi

Posting for Thursday, June 20th, 2013

To say I have been in somewhat of a funk for the last year or maybe year and half sounds funny but rings true.  I can't quite place my finger on it, but it feels like the real Kazi is on her way back.  For instance, last summer I barely went to the pool or pretty much anywhere, now I can or feel I can go almost anywhere.

Hard to explain, but trust me, I feel so much free-er this summer and this year in general.  Starting my job a year ago after being unemployed 11 months has been an adjustment for me in many ways, not only learning to job and the day to day changes (hey change is good), but also the dynamics of many relationships I have forged at my new place of employment. 

Everyone that knows me knows that I have trust issues.  I just do.  So when I trust someone it's a big deal for me and them, however, they may not know their importance in this role.  When that trust is severed or compromised it takes awhile to get it back, if ever.  I am a pretty forgiving person at times, if it is warranted, that is.  Sometimes, I will admit I don't forgive it's no way no how I am DONE with you.  Maybe I shouldn't be like that, but hey, it is how I am.  Like it or leave it. 

This may or not be relevant to this blog, but take my trip to Indy last weekend.  First time I drove through allllllll those lanes by myself and I didn't freak out, I didn't like it, but I did'nt freak out, that says I have come a long way right there.  I had a nice time, but wouldn't want to live there!  Nope not at all.  I know the jobs pay better in that area but I am not interested, contrary to my daughter and Bobby trying their best to make me want to move up that way to be closer to them. 

Only one thing that has be off of my A game, and that is gaining weight......